


It's Pronounced ES-pressoo not EX-presso

by GreetingsFromThePunderworld



Category: My Chemical Romance
Genre: Arguing, Coffee, Cute, Frank is a ten litre trash bag full of douche, Gerard is very incorrect, I hope this is funny, The more tags the better amirite, Title is referencing Harry potter?, crack!fic, is this funny?
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-11-25
Updated: 2016-11-25
Packaged: 2018-09-01 07:11:39
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,119
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8614534
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/GreetingsFromThePunderworld/pseuds/GreetingsFromThePunderworld
Summary: Frank and Gerard are in disagreement on how to pronounce espresso.It's cyute?





	

**Author's Note:**

> Short lil thang I wrote at 1:00 am. 
> 
> I don't really know, to be honest, I'm not going to worry about it. Have a great day.

"You know, I'd agree with you, but then we'd both be really wrong." Gerard shuffled a small step forward in the unmoving line.

 

Frank huffed out a sigh of annoyance. "Whatever."

 

Both Frank and Gerard had been butting heads in a lengthy dispute over the pronunciation of espresso. Neither making headway in either direction.

 

Not wanting to give up, Frank started again, "I'm telling you it's ES-press-o."

 

"I have gone to one too many coffee shops for it to not be EX-press-o. I practically live in these things." Gerard countered with a flourish of hands at the busy teens at work preparing PSL's and caramel macchiato's.

 

They both took another step forward in the unusually slow line.

 

"Yeah well do you see up there?" Frank pointed to the list of items on the menu above the cashier counter. "It's spelled with an s not an x. Go back to fucking kindergarten."

 

"That has nothing to do with how it's pronounced. I don't think you even know how English works." Said, Gerard.

 

Frank was irked and he had been for the past week. "The size of your ego is obnoxious." 

 

Gerard huffed indignantly. The line crept forward again, it was now their turn to order.

 

The guy behind the register asked, "What will it be?"

 

"I'll have an Americano, with two shots of ES-presso." Frank held up two fingers and leaned in closer towards the cashier, resting himself on the counter.

 

Gerard lightly shoved Frank to the side so he could order. "And I would like a caramel mocha, with only one shot of EX-presso."

 

The acne covered teen nodded and punched their order into the cash register, "Okay, that'll be 9 dollars and 48 cents. Is it for here or to-go?"

 

"To-go please." Gerard pulled out his wallet to pay for the order but Frank beat him too it. The shorter man stepped in front of Gerard and handed the cashier a ten, he needed to instate his dominance.

 

"Do you believe this guy?" Frank motioned towards Gerard with his thumb. "He thinks its expresso, well I say its espresso." Frank turned towards Gerard. "Let's get some input from an educated member of this coffee establishment." Frank turned back towards the mildly confused teenager whom was no-doubted getting paid minimum wage for having to deal with customers like Frank all day. "What say you, young employee?"

 

He handed them their change. "Please move to the next counter, your holding up the line."

 

Gerard muttered an apology, before pulling Frank along. Gerard caught Frank muttering something along the lines of "Stupid mouth breather, didn't know what he was doing. Social goddam justice warriors should just stay on Tumblr."

 

Gerard sighed and picked up their coffee that had been set on the counter.

 

"Hurry up Frank, the bus is going to leave without us... Again." On many previous endeavors to acquire coffee, their disputes had held the two of them up in line long enough for the tour bus to leave without them. Mikey, Ray, Bert and everyone else on tour with them wanted literally nothing to do with it, Gerard assumed they were just leaving them on purpose now.

 

 

 

 

Their debate had continued on the bus and along to the next show, by that time Gerard was royally pissed off and determined to be proven correct. 

 

In between the performance of two songs Gerard decided to ask the audience.

 

"For the past month," He began. "Frank and I have been in a little disagreement." Gerard paused, and jutted out his hip promptly putting his hand on it, "about something." He finished.

 

Gerard could tell undoubtedly that the crowd was as confused as the rest of the band. Ray had caught on quickly and began improvising, both Mikey and Bob followed suit.

 

Ray and Mikey shot him strange looks. Frank just smirked, waiting for this to blow up in Gerard's face so he could tell him to take an L.

 

Ray had quickly caught on and began improvising with his guitar. Mikey and Bob followed suit on their own instruments.

 

Frank walked up to the spare microphone "Just so you know Way, I am right." The audience screamed and yelled. Frank played a short riff on his guitar holding eye contact with Gerard for dramatic effect.

 

They both knew this whole thing was pretty stupid and were only making a big deal out of it due to the boredom of touring and being trapped in a cramped car for hours at a time.

 

"Now just wait," Gerard continued, breaking away from Franks stare too look at the audience. "I'm gonna need everybody to get real quiet so I can hear," he waited as the screams slowly died down.

 

Gerard walked to the edge of the stage and squatted down. "Now, I'm gonna get one person to give me an answer... Stay quiet now." Gerard Drew out the sentence, playing the audiences anticipation. "What is the right... way... too say... expresso? With an Ssss or an X?" He finished quickly, knowing their fans would get a kick out of the ridiculousness of the situation.

 

He pointed the microphone out towards the closest person and they shouted: "With an S!"

 

Frank promptly began playing the next song, a massive grin on his face. Gerard had to go with it and began singing the lyrics.

 

Frank could really be a first class douche bag. Not even like a Walmart grocery bag full of douche, more like a 10-liter trash bag just oozing douche.

 

"I really hate you sometimes you know?" Gerard playfully spat out playfully after the show.

 

"Hey, it's not me who decided to ask thousands of people in a live audience." Frank held up his arms in defense.

 

"I'm not even convinced, it's not like they got that straight from a dictionary." Gerard was not going to let this go.

 

"Your too deep in denial, I'm not even going try and help unbury you." Mikey cut in.

 

"You too Mikey? My own brother? What about Ray? Where is the bastard?" At that moment Ray walked into the room with a thick book open in hand.

 

"I hate to admit Gee, but looks like your wrong." Ray handed him the dictionary opened to the E section.

 

"You are the bane of my existence Frank Iero!" Gerard yelled.

 

"Your words don't hurt me!" Frank replied.

 

"What about these words? Do they hurt?!?" Gerard hurled the dictionary at Frank. He hit him square in the face, he ran from the room. He hoped that hadn't hurt too much.

 

Gerard sulked in self-pity for the next couple if days, in an attempt to make him feel better Frank got him a coffee,  
ES-presso to be exact.


End file.
